Monday, April 23, 2012

Contemplating the MESS!

I'm sitting here....procrastinating as usual (this time its procrastinating in going to bed......during the day I am tired, then once everyone else is in bed, I enjoy my quiet & alone time so much, I have the singular thought "I can sleep when I'm dead".

Upon my procrastination journey through Pinterest (My link to my boards is right over there >>>) I started thinking about the mess children make and the myths some people seem to believe (that or they have major denial mode kicking in, I am guilty of this too). They think if they limit or take away the toys, this will limit the mess.

I am coming forward to say THIS IS NOT TRUE. Children have the imagination & determination to make a mess from whatever comes to hand. Locking your cabinets & cupboards won't help either. Gosh forbid you leave one singulat cupboard unlocked, they will find that cupboard and create mass destruction.

My children are capable of making the GROSSEST mess compiled just of their lunch ingredients & paper. I can go into my beautiful just cleaned loungeroom, and find that they have left the dining area, jettisoned themselves across the house, and created a mess of crumbs, crust, apple skin and cut up miniscule paper ALL OVER my just vacuumed carpet. They have got this routine down pat to two minutes. 120 seconds and the loungeroom goes from decor magazine to landfill. AND for the LOVE of all that is holy, do NOT let my children get a hold of tomato sauce or peanut butter. I made the mistake of leaving both on the benchtop whilst I went out back to feed the dogs. BIGGEST mistake ever. I came back inside to find one of the dining chairs re-upholstered with peanut butter, said butter was trailed all across the wall, into the hallway across my whitegoods, and smeared all around the walls of the bathroom. The entire tomato sauce bottle was upended on my carpet. Cleaning peanut butter off the toilet wall has to be the most gross situation.

And my children aren't the only ones to try to dip into my never-ending patience. My DH has big feet, thus big shoes, and has the habit of taking them off in the middle of the hall, middle of doorway, middle of room, anywhere where I am likely to go a** over t** and nearly kill myself.

And the final drama? The toilet paper has to be locked away. The children will rip it into pieces and create snowmen, and if they don't touch it and you leave it (h I don't know, where its MEANT to be) then the cats seem to think the TP is some sort of alien bent on attacking them, as you'll wake up to it shredded into pieces and them still skulking around waiting for the TP to attack again.

I gave up on rugs about a year ago, after going through about 10 rugs in 7 years. My children seem to congregate around the rug, and plot ways for its demise. This includes, but is not limited to: - Yoghurt splats, leaving their "leavings" (when they were younger of course), said tomato sauce, stashing noodles and rice just to smoosh into rugs, and many other bewildering situations.

Now don't get me wrong, my children, DH & my cats are nice, good people. :D They just have certain creative centers that seem to focus on destructive imaginative. If I clean a room, internal sensors on anybody in the house automatically "pings" and knows, and they head towards this lovely shiny room, and become.......NOT my family, people I don't know. They go absolutely barmy, like a snowstorm, until room is suitable for their messy tastes again, they calm down and leave.

Luckily, I have a special secret whenever I am getting frustrated and upset, I just head over to Parenting Illustrated with Crappy Pictures and suddenly, I'm giggling and laughing and everything is okay again, I soldier on.

So whenever your having a bad day, and everyone has got you down, just head to her site, and rest assured, everything will seem okay again :D

Miss E.


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